I could surely use some help...

[Blues003]

Hey there, Infinity. I'm a 19 year-old boy, who happens to be incredibly in love with a 19-year old girl. I met her about one year and a half ago, and since then I haven't been able to look at any other girl besides her in a more romantic way.

I can say I'm usually quite picky when it comes to girls. You see, my tastes are quite particular. Usually most guys just want for a hot body, while I prefer a sweet, romantic, honest, interesting girl. She doesn't have to be pretty nor have an amazing body. She just has to have those qualities. I can't imagine myself dating someone who is not a good person... and just like I believe that physics are extremely overrated nowadays, I also expect the girl to think samewise.

Let us not be hypocrites: physical attraction ARE there, and there is nothing we can do about that. I usually try to leave that out, but there is always a small influence, no matter how hard I try. And it is only natural, after all we are animals, we have hormones, and it is perfectly normal that physics have its influences. And this is where the girl, is special.

So far I have had my loves and so, but there was always a small bit of physical attraction into it as well. It could be something really tiny, but it still influenced a bit. With Agnes, it was different.

When I met her, I already knew more or less who she was. After all, my mother and hers were teachers at the same school, and we were at said school too. She was furthermore known because she has a twin. And pretty much everyone in that school (we should be around 2000 students or so) knew that she was a formidable person. I then decided to meet her one day. It was the beggining of the summer holidays...

We spent some time together in those months, and boy was I enchanted. She was everything I had ever looked for on a girl, AND I could feel my feelings for her had nothing to do with her looks. I mean, she's kinda cute and so, but that's all there is to it. I felt a powerful, yet inocent and pure love-like feeling for her. I loved talking to her, we debated tons and tons of interesting subjects, you get the picture. And the best of all: she felt the same way.

We did not started dating by incredibly bad timing. Exactly when things were leading that way, Faculty started. Our first year. I went to Medicine, she went to Germanic and Romanic Languages. That'd be okay, after all we live in the same city. Problem is, she became too invovled on hazing activities. For those who don't know, hazing activities are traditional rituals here in Portugal (I believe there are some in other countries though), in which older people of your faculty have the power to order you whatever they want. Some faculties, like hers, have incredibly well-organized hazing activities, in which the freshmen have fun, get to know eachother and the older people as well... in my faculty, hazing activities were all about humilliation and pointless sacrifice. I was in it till the end, but never became a big fan of it. She, on the other hand, did. Not only that, as she joined one of her faculty's musical group. That group ALSO has its own hazing activities, and is quite demanding time-wise.

Conclusion? The year made her feelins go away. She is way too focused on all that. Not only she has lost the time for me (hell, sometimes she can't even answer a simple text-message in the same day I send her one), but she has also lost the time for lots of her pre-faculty friends.

I, on the other hand, remained under the spell of love. I tried desperatly to make her fall for me again. The problem is that, although she acknowledges she is getting far from people, she also says that her faculty hazing-activities are addicting and time-consuming. She is also insecure, which makes her be influenced by those people who pretty much dedicate 24h of their days to those activities...

I have been very patient, I have holded on for 1 year and a half with only some answers here and there, just because she IS so different from everyone else. I desperatly want to hold her tight and kiss her gently, but I can't do that until I know she has feelings for me. And the only way she'll ever have feelings for me again is if she actually gives me the chance to. How am I supposed to do that if she is always so occupied with everything that her Faculty implies?

EDIT: Yesterday I was kinda harsh on her. I got to my limit and told her that I was her friend, she should count on me in order to overcome her problems, not just let them get bigger on her inside just because she had no time for hazing activities. I think I did a pretty good job at controlling my anger, but what I told her was kinda intense nonetheless, culminating in something like telling her there's no point in being friends if she won't talk or won't let me help her. Today I will probably meet her. I usually have an easy time distuinguishing right from wrong, but now I have completely lost track of references. I will apologise even if I am not sure I did something wrong (to tell the truth, I was so blinded in madness that I don't remember half of what passed through my head - luckily, I was talkin to her via text-messages, so I have the record of what I told her, and I never crossed hte line). I am also going to tell her that I AM here for her, that hazing activities are supposed to make you win new friends, not lose old ones... and try to convince her to invest a little bit more into this. What do you guys think?

[KPT25]

Well that's quite a complicated situation...with someone so occupied that she doesn't have "apparently" any time to be with old friends,thinks could turn a little difficult...
I believe a good idea would be to be available when she has time off   

[.:K.I.N.G:.]

well she cant be occupied for ever you know is she is then she will get bored eventually anyways...free time will come sooner or later...you did got tired of being patient didn't you?

you sound like good dude...talk it out with her and express yourself...at least this way you'll know if she dose have feelings for u...only then you'll know if you should or shouldn't wait for her.

[Blues003]

For now she has NO free time. Only if she decides not to sleep so she can actually talk to me. And considering that hazing activities only give her a 6-to-7-hours-average of sleep per day, I am not going to make her do that.

I suppose I could wait for her. She did get enchanted once, so maybe she could get enchanted again. However, who or what guarantees me that that will happen? Her course are 4 years. That means 3 more years of this. What if she actually gets a boyfriend who is as involved in hazing activities as she is until then? Man, this sucks...

[ATiC3]

I was in your exact situation just a few months ago, actually... no lie... She had NO time for me... she worked all of the time because her parents were either too sick to work or disabled... She had no time for me what-so-ever .... and the only thing I would suggest to you is to give it more time... or if you truly love her that much... wait for her to have more time...

That's really all I can suggest...

[Violent Ken Masters]

For now she has NO free time. Only if she decides not to sleep so she can actually talk to me. And considering that hazing activities only give her a 6-to-7-hours-average of sleep per day, I am not going to make her do that.

I suppose I could wait for her. She did get enchanted once, so maybe she could get enchanted again. However, who or what guarantees me that that will happen? Her course are 4 years. That means 3 more years of this. What if she actually gets a boyfriend who is as involved in hazing activities as she is until then? Man, this sucks...

You should just tell her how you feel. Just give her a phone call, or write her a letter or something.
It's better to just do things instead of stumbling on your feet and wondering of what might happen. 

The only problem I see here is, as your asking a bunch of other people what to do, that girl might be finding another guy at the same time.

Just tell her that even though your schedules are harsh, that you would like the two of you to be something more then friends, and that you're willing to wait for her.
If she rejects you, then you can move forward in your life, if she doesn't then you can move forward in your life.

[Blues003]

Well, the story pretty much ended, I guess. Apparenly she just told a friend of hers she did not get that enchanted. Even though at the time she said things such as "I'm afraid I'll start loving you in a matter of days" or "I loved when you dreamt we were dating". Not to mention the completely incounterable "I was under your spell.". Yes, she told me that kind of stuff. So I really don't see why know she says she wasn't as into me as I thought she had been. Oh well, at least now I know for sure. What do you guys think?

[Violent Ken Masters]

Just tell her that you would still like to be friends, and if she ever wants to be something more, you'll always be there.

[xPreatorianx]

Like everyone else has said just tell her your feelings if she rejects you well atleast you have tried your damndest to get your feelings out. Also if she just wants to be friends do that, it can always lead to something more then just friends in the future.

[Blues003]

From all this time I'm absolutely sure she knows my feelings. Besides, that would only cause some attriction right now. If I meet her tonight I'll tell her everything I want to, and then wait for her reaction. Anyways, thank you guys.

[xPreatorianx]

No problem m8, hope everything turns out well for you.

[Blues003]

Didn't meet her, she wasn't there. I ended up talking to her through my cellphone. She says it's most likely her fault, but this coloured-friendship thing isn't just working and she needs to get away. Even more, which is kinda ridiculous considering that was her problem at first. Anyway, I'll wait an see. She'll probably get full power on all those hazing activities. I told her that once she came back to her "old world", not to forget me, as I'd be here. Yeah, kinda cheesy, I know, but it's the truth. Let's wait and see now...

[Violent Ken Masters]

Didn't meet her, she wasn't there. I ended up talking to her through my cellphone. She says it's most likely her fault, but this coloured-friendship thing isn't just working and she needs to get away. Even more, which is kinda ridiculous considering that was her problem at first. Anyway, I'll wait an see. She'll probably get full power on all those hazing activities. I told her that once she came back to her "old world", not to forget me, as I'd be here. Yeah, kinda cheesy, I know, but it's the truth. Let's wait and see now...

Well you did what you had to. 

[Sub-Zero]

i dont think it would be the right time to break up with her

she needs help and ur the only one who can help

stick it thru and help her witht he hazing problem

and go beat all those ppl's asses

[Blues003]

Problem being she doesn't allow me to help her. She doesn't recognize her need for help. And what's worse, she said she needed her distance.